I’m in the wedding industry. I love the feeling of love. I love that people look into each other’s eyes and fall in love. I love when the groom looks at his bride for the first time and she melts. I love dating and the anticipation that you’ll spend the rest of your life with the one you love. So, it’s no surprise that Valentine’s Day is my all time favorite Holiday of the year. Too bad it’s not yet a Federal Holiday.
When you think of Valentine’s Day you probably think of hearts, flowers, candy, people you love, cherubs and other symbols related to the holiday. But have you ever wondered who Valentine really was? According to About.com Emperor Claudius II, born c. 214 A.D., was emperor of Rome from 268-270. He believed that young men made better soldiers if they were unattached, he outlawed marriage for them. Father Valentine, believing the law was unjust and cruel, continued to secretly perform marriages. When Claudius learned of Valentine’s defiance, he had him jailed and threatened him with death. But Valentine would not be dissuaded. To add to the lore and drama – which makes the love story better, legend says that during his incarceration Valentine himself fell in love with a young girl who visited him daily. The girl was believed to be the jailer’s daughter. This enraged the warden who urged Claudius to have Valentine killed. But Valentine was even more determined that love should win out and refused. Claudius ordered him to be put to death. It is said the priest himself sent the first Valentine’s letter when he wrote a farewell note to the jailer’s daughter and signed it, “From Your Valentine,” this signature is still popular today. Over time the holiday evolved. The commercialization of February 14th came hundreds of years later – to much of the dismay of many men.
I’m often asked, what is a clever way to say “I love you” and I will always answer “the way you said it just now.” Valentine’s Day is the one time of the year when you don’t need an excuse to say “I love you!” You don’t have to buy a box of chocolates and a dozen roses – although it does make it extra special. The most important aspect of celebrating Valentine’s Day is actually saying “I love you” to that person that means the world to you.
You would be surprised by all the thought that goes into making Valentine’s Day special for many guys. Sometimes they get so hung up on trying to out-do last year that they loose focus on what is important. I was recently told that Michael Buble, the song writer, wrapped a pair of old, dirty sneakers in a box. Around the sneakers he filled the empty space with Hershey’s Kisses. The note inside read; “I will walk a thousand miles for one of your kisses.” Cute, but from my vantage point, girls don’t necessarily care about all of that thought process. They want someone to simply love them. If this were not true, we wouldn’t have so many match-making websites making millions of dollars per year. It’s a huge money making industry.
So men, take heed. It’s not necessary to spend the farm on this Valentine’s day. Revisit the first grade memory of construction paper, doilies, paste and crayons. Hand-make your valentine and simply sign it “From Your Valentine” and your girl will know that translation all too well. It will conjure up some more brownie points if you sign it “I love you… and only you”.
Here is something fun to do with your Valentine. Ask your Valentine these questions and see how much you really know about them.
• If you could relive one day of your relationship, what day would it be?
• Where would you travel if you could go anywhere in the world?
• Who is more romantic, you or him?
• What is the best relationship advice that you have ever gotten?
• Can a couple be too much in love? Why or why not?
• What is her favorite song? His?
• Where and when was your first kiss?
• How did you meet?
• Where was your first date?
• Guess where your partner would like to go if you could leave right now for a weekend vacation.
• Finish this poem: Roses are red, violets are blue…
